Today’s world consists of endless knowledge and information about what self-improvement is or could be. It could portray absolute success, happiness, and pure satisfaction. It says that If we follow a certain schedule, routine, practice, skincare, or self-care Sunday it will set us up for greatness. While that could be true for some, it is not for all. This is the same thing I see with healing. An obsession to heal. To become better than before, or that we have ever been. While introspection can be used to achieve self-awareness, it isn’t the only way to heal or improve.
The truth is healing is not linear, in no way shape or form and it is not a way to perfect ourselves. It should be used as a way to understand ourselves and develop more human qualities – empathy, understanding, and compassion. If we are healing to craft ourselves out of being human and trying to be perfect all of the time, that’s when we must take a couple of steps back away from the introspection and give ourselves a break. Sometimes there does not need to be an answer to every grief, worry, struggle, or sadness. Overanalyzing can lead to false beliefs about the world and ourselves. We can let our own bias take over where it can interpret our reality and if nothing fits that mold we have created – it is wrong. The truth is, we can always find meaning in something (I am a believer in optimistic meanings and a huge believer in finding meaning in EVERYTHING), but that does not mean it’s crucial to apply it all the time. It’s best to feel rather than think through our thoughts – So when we heal, we can understand how to work with them not think through them.
The point of being alive is not to heal everything we do not want. It is not to heal ourselves into a perfect idea. I’m not saying ignore our traumas and our fears and worries – what I’m saying here is that if we let these things run our lives to the point of only focusing on the healing we are going to miss out on the living part of life.
If the journey of self-awareness is leading to self-criticism, then something is not right here and we must take a lead in the other direction. We cannot believe everything we think and that’s why it’s important to have loving people who can help critique us – give us another point of view, and help us see things in a loving light again.
We don’t need constant introspection if it doesn’t lead to self-acceptance.
The point of self-awareness and healing is to develop an ability to understand and cope with what our imperfections are, not ridicule all that they could be.
The way to heal is through self-accepting behaviours and developments of character.
We must understand that we can not heal ourselves in a world where darkness doesn’t exist, it always will… Therefore, in saying this, we have to accept both the light and dark of ourselves. The yin and yang are part of the natural human conditioning. We would not have a greater appreciation for the people, places, and situations we were once in if it were not for the dark.
Don’t heal to be perfect.
Heal to understand, accept, feel, and let ourselves develop into unconditional human beings.
“Life isn’t just about darkness or light, rather it’s about finding light within the darkness.”
– Landon Parham
