Ring Ring,- it’s your phone notification… this time, do you decide to get back together or break up officially? I mean, who wants to be apart of the make-up break-up situation every week? It’s messy, inconvenient, and highly frustrating to begin with. We all be accountable for doing something similar to waking up with a clear head, then all of a sudden we reach for our phones with half an eye open to see who liked our picture or messaged us on our social media apps. To our utmost surprise (or not) the emotions that come after that moment can rearrange the way we will see the day or act towards it and it hasn’t even started! One outcome might seem better than the other, but they are both, still, the least promising. Sure, they might have messaged and liked your picture or whatever the case, but you still are running on the possibility and codependency of more dopamine from that app or person.
It’s a frightening scene like the one in twilight zone black and white, gray area, static engulfs around you but,filled with a glimpse of despair and anxiety.
However, It might not actually be like that, but that’s how it was for me. It was becoming an actual problem where I thought I needed to get help for the lack of attention I was giving to myself and my passions. I thought I was going mad for not being interested in things and just chasing this weird heart rate raising rush. It was like going between two different emotions at once, I’d be excited and happy then after that moment I’d feel worthless and confused. It was all happening at once in .5 of a minute…I realized and did an expansion of research for my own good and for the good of others so we can reach a more understandable field of how we choose to participate in these resources and if we actually care about them at all!
We live in a world of constant pleasure and stimulation of the senses and emotions. They demand our attention immediately. What it does is causes a splurge of pleasure, a rather short one. The after-effects are emptiness, which also makes you want to fill it even more with the same thing it causes you emptiness with. A swifty device made for infinite consumption. I have a more detailed description here for the facts on what it is doing to you and the point of it’s existence to some extent:
The Solution?
Reducing the impulse, removing the stimulus, disabling and replacing.
- Reduce the Impulse: Do not sleep with your phone near you (ever) for that matter and make sure you turn off wifi or put on airplane mode. Another important note to add: If you find the impulse simply replace it with a better-suited habit, for me if I find the impulse I either read, start writing or go for a walk, or meditate until the craving passes by.
- Remove the stimulus: Disabling all notifications and set your theme color to black and white in settings, so it represents a newspaper that you’d likely not look twice at, if it were a bright, vivid colored newspaper, you’d most likely pick it up. To put it in a better perspective.
- Bring attention to the urge within yourself to grab your phone and sit with it. What is the feeling? Anxiousness? Pleasure? Boredom?
- What is the reward you’re craving from it? Security? Love? Happiness?
- Find out the trigger– the activity that sparks that one thought into grabbing your phone. For this step, you might need to concentrate on your thoughts. Is it the location you’re in that sparks it? The time of day? Emotional state? Maybe a person?
- Commit and stick to a plan – This plan can look like something simple, for example: Say at a certain time of day you have that thought to grab your phone, fit something else in that time slot that you enjoy doing instead. Call a friend, head somewhere in nature, or read. This is also going to be based on the reward you want, so if the reward you find yourself trying to get; Let’s say social interaction and the trigger is loneliness, set that specific time out to call someone you like speaking to. You can also take it slow by setting out a day to only go on your phone for 1 hour, then gradually increase the number of days. The idea here is to start small so you don’t go into overdrive on wanting dopamine and then have to start over. Also, try doing 1 week per year with no phone!
Bonus Tips: Put all your apps into one folder, that way you have to search for what you want.
Ask yourself: Are the apps that you give attention to giving you the value you need? Or are there more setbacks to it?
In conclusion, I hope you found these tips and information useful and create a more balanced, still lifestyle. I know in my personal experience I have been sleeping better, planning my days better and my mind is more clear. I have more time to fill with creativity, writing, reading, and doing yoga. Most importantly for me, I enjoy doing things again and the apps don’t affect me as much as they used to, I don’t have to rely on them to give me some sort of pleasure at all… I have gained control! Which is the idea I present here: Gain your life, free will, and control back.
Please comment and tell me if you tried this and how it has been working for you,
Providingtruth
